days later i felt like im in a limbo. i did some stupid things... i was back to my "hated" old self for a time... thanks to a friend and some inner strength left i was able to survive it... then an SMS message arrived...
just like that, i raised my threshold level a notch higher again... i don't know if you've noticed but i've been avoiding the word love like it's some kind of plague but the truth is i dont't know what to call what i am doing... for sure there is love, but what else is there? pride, selfishness, lust, pity, being a genteleman, trying to be nice... martyrdom and masochism on the extreme.... i dont know... but can i just call it simply as "Love" ?
i have been trying to understand what i am into... but the more answer and evidences that i found, the more questions and puzzles came out...
right now, im happy being with her... if i eliminate all other things and all that"s left is her... i would really be glad and thankful, happy and contented...
next: who is she?
Monday, March 20, 2006
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