fish

as i was saying(or writing) in my earlier blog i will update this blog on November, then i realized it is already the 6th of November (happy bday granny!) and i have to update akatenshi hush...
what happened?
i was all set to go to jakarta, projects are coming in and im thinking of financial rewards, i had quit smoking,…. for short i am on my way of living the way i always imagined... im high!!!
then suddenly,
things took sudden sharp turns, my supposed trip didn’t materialize (worst it was my Gg’s bday and i was not there), i was on financial burden because there were some unexpected expenses and then my boss was keeping my check without my knowledge (for the intention of borrowing it, as it was only given to me today and was borrowed of course) and frustration came sneaking and i puffed a cigarette (after weeks of quitting)
the past weeks, im feeling like i lost some battles, i was really contemplating so hard if really did forgot God during the days or weeks that i was on a high… i was asking myself were the things i did was to please Gg? or God? ifelt the answer was yes, so ibegged for forgiveness and shared the story with Gg

last week, Friday, iwas feeling very sick that i have difficulty walking but still i went to this small church in a mall, and there was a big celebration because it was first friday and it was the feast day of st. martin de porres who is the patron of public health, and i realized that i was forgiven for the wrong that i have done

last night, i attended a baptismal celebration where i was invited to be a godparent(i think it's my 3rd time in the past 2 months, not counting the baptismal of my nephew which thankfully i wasn't a godfather), so i was thinking of "here we go again, the same script that starts from lighting candles in the church and ends with small talks at the reception"... normally, i wouldn't go drinking with people i hardly knew... so, there i was seated with a 50ish veterinarian (in whose house we are in, actually it's a small "bahay-kubo" on the lawn of his house), his kumpare who is a 60 year-old former sales manager that reminds a lot of a young berting labra which really good sense of humor, a mid-30's private investigator who looks tough but actually is mr. romantic and the vet's assistant/carpenter who is my new "kumpare"... they are a group of people who actually knew each other and im the newbie...
i popped my first bottle of beer thinking that it will be over in 10 minutes and then i'll be leaving to do whatever household chore i could on a sunday afternoon... half-way through my bottle, fsm (former sales manager) has kept me fascinated with his stories, he's the same age as dad so i was all ears, doc( the vet) is also an interesting person and pi(private investigator) has some quite amusing stories especially when he started to get a bit tipsy... it was so amazed that i got along easily with the group, just there listening to their stories.
doc lived a high-profile life for having the surname "javier" but is a very humble person these days (danny of the popular trio APO was his 1st-degree cousin, but never once in the entire conversations did he mention it), he had a bad marriage which resulted to an accident that damaged half of his face, he is now living in with someone who really loves him and take cares of him, hence, he can get drunk and all and believes that someone would be there to take care of him... he is a really nice fellow and very friendly... but i think he will be happier if his 1st marriage will be annulled(his first application was declined) so he can marry his current partner and then have another child or two.
pi is the person whom i can tell works for the government, and i was right… before becoming a pi he was a government employee… he was quoting this filipino movie “milan” several times… the line goes like this “mahal mo ako dahil kailangan mo ako o kailangan mo ako kaya minahal mo ako”….. which, for me has the same meaning but yes, if you assume it in a situation then the meanings would eventually change… i admire the guy for being a strong person, for 5 years of married life they still don’t a have kid after his wife had a miscarriage on the 1^st year of their marriage and the guy is still so romantic to his wife, or maybe he was just horny that night… but no, i felt sincerity there…
the best conversations i had though was with fsm… he was married at least twice (without annulment)… he have 2 daughters with his current wife who are also both married and he abhors both his in-laws for really valid reasons…
I was able to but in once, where i explained that in Greek there are four words for love. stergo which is for family members, fileo for friends, eros for sensual love (hence the word erotic) and agape, the highest form of love which is loving without expecting anything in return.

I really like talking to guys older than me…. experience always beats intelligence… all the time!

after hearing their stories, i felt lucky and blessed… my problems became so small as compared to theirs!

This was the 2^nd time that I’ve been in a similar situation; the first time this happened to me was when i was on a ministry to a depressed area for yfc, my problems was so small compared to those youths that shared stories.